Lifestyle & Health | Aids Affairs

October 20, 2015

I want to talk to him about HIV

Dear Counsellor:

I am 17 and my boyfriend is 38. He loves me and he treats me like a father would. He does not pressure me for sex. He wants me to finish my exams first, but I cannot wait to have sex with him. Every time we are together I want to have sex with him, but he keeps telling me he does not want to spoil our relationship. My mother and the rest of my family love him very much. My bigger sister keeps warning me about HIV, sometimes I have to wonder if she is bad minded. My boyfriend looks very good and he has never been sick since I met him. How Can I know if he is HIV positive? I would like to talk with him about HIV as well but I am not sure what to say, please help me?

Teen Lover

Dear Teen Lover:

You cannot tell if he is HIV positive just by looking at him. There is always risk of contracting HIV the virus that causes AIDS and other sexually transmitted infections unless you are totally confident about yourself and your partner. Most people have trouble talking about their risk for HIV. Current or past partners may avoid telling you whether they have been exposed or infected with HIV. However you should ask your boyfriend (straight up) about his risk for HIV, and whether he has been tested. If you cannot be sure that your boyfriend is free of HIV then you must suggest that he get tested. Remember the only way to be sure he is HIV free is if he is tested. The HIV test can be done free of charge at any government health centre.

Dear Counsellor:

I am infected with herpes but my girlfriend is not infected. Can we have children?

Want to be Father

Dear "Want to be Father":

Herpes infection does not prevent a person from having children. However, a mother who is infected with herpes can pass it on to her child during delivery. Therefore, it is important for the infected mother to inform her health care provider so that the necessary precautions can be taken at delivery time to prevent the child from becoming infected. You need not worry about having children because many persons with herpes do have healthy babies. Remember that all you need to do now is to take the necessary precautions to prevent your girlfriend from becoming infected since the unborn child is at risk only if the mother is infected. But let me reiterate, a mother infected with herpes can have a healthy uninfected baby.

Dear Counsellor:

I had a yellow discharge I went to the doctor and was told I have tric. Can you tell me the symptoms of that disease and how did I get it? I am very concern about this disease and what it can do to my body. Can tric be cured? Will it turn to AIDS?

Concerned Writer

Dear Concerned Writer:

Trichomoniasis or "tric" is a sexually transmitted infection. It is transmitted by having unprotected oral, vaginal or anal sex with someone who has trichomoniasis. Symptoms may include:

• Itching and inflammation of the vulva and outer vagina.

• A yellowish or greenish discharge, which may be slimy or foamy and blood stained

• Pain during sex

• Some women may carry the infection without visible symptoms

n Men with trichomoniasis usually show no symptoms.

Trichomoniasis can be cured but you must take all your medication as prescribed by your health care provider. Do not have sex while taking treatment. Trichomoniasis will not turn to AIDS; AIDS is caused by the Human Immunodeficiency Virus (HIV). If you use a condom every time you have sex this will prevent you from becoming infected with sexually transmitted infections including HIV the virus that causes AIDS.

Dear Counsellor:

I found out about six months ago that I'm infected with a sexual disease and to make it worse I'm dating a new man. This disease makes my life very uncomfortable and I can blame no one but my ex-boyfriend. He knew he had it but he did nothing to protect me. Can I transmit a sexual disease when there are no symptoms? I don't remember the name of the disease but I was experiencing a pus discharge.

Careful Lover

Dear Careful Lover:

It is best not to have sex while been treated for a sexually transmitted infection (STI), even if the symptoms you experienced disappeared. Because symptoms will disappear even without treatment but the germ remains in your body and you are capable of passing it on to your sex partner. In addition, having sex while you are being treated for a STI will only prolong and irritate the illness. This may cause the treatment not to work properly. However, if at all you must have sex ensure to use a condom every time.

For more information on condom use, HIV/AIDS and other sexually transmitted infections call the AIDS/STD Helpline at toll free at 1888-991-4444.

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