I don't want my brother at my wedding

February 19, 2016

Dear Pastor,

Greetings in the name of Jesus. I have been reading your column. I enjoy doing so. I am 25. I plan to get married. I have a brother who partially lives on the street. My fiance doesn't know him. He knows my other brothers, but not the one who is on the street.

When my fiancÈ is in the island, my brother stays away because he is on drugs. When he is not fooling around drugs he is a nice brother. His girlfriend has tried to help him. She has two children. People say the children are not for him, but we are still good friends. When she needs money she tells me. I try to help out.

I told my brother I was getting married. He asked if he should come. I told him no, but would send him cake and wine. He asked why. I told him that I didn't want to be embarrassed. He got angry.

His girlfriend told me she would make sure he is well dressed and clean, so I should let him come to the wedding. I am thinking it would be a good time to introduce him to my husband. He told me he doesn't want any cake and wine from me if he can't come to the wedding, and I am disrespecting the family.

I am worried because I don't know if he will be under drugs when he comes to the wedding, but I am thinking about it. Do you think I should allow him to come?


Dear M.N.,

Please tell your brother he should be prepared to attend the wedding. Talk to his girlfriend. Let her know you are depending on her to assist him to remain off drugs, to watch him like hawk so he does not drink any alcoholic beverage or take any drug that could cause him to behave irrationally.

I also suggest you inform your fiancÈ, long before your wedding, about this brother. I am glad you are getting married. I wish you well.


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