I stole my girlfriend's man!


April 05, 2016

Dear Pastor,

I am 33 years old and my boyfriend is 27. We have been going together for three years. I know what I did to get him is wrong. It was a very bad thing, but he does not see it that way. He was in a relationship with a girlfriend of mine and one day he called me at my office and asked me what I was doing for the weekend, I told him nothing. He suggested that we should go to Montego Bay for the weekend because his girlfriend was going to a wedding in Florida. I was glad for the opportunity to get away from Kingston because the guy I was dating and I were not getting along very well and I wasn't answering his calls. So I told this guy I would go with him if he knew that everything was OK on his side, because on my side it was alright.

We left Kingston Friday evening after work and we had nothing but fun on our way, and in Montego Bay. We came back to Kingston just about midnight Sunday night. We did everything that was wrong during that weekend. We drank and for the first time I smoked ganja. I could not keep my clothes on when we were in the hotel room. On our way back to Kingston, I told him that I felt guilty. He said I should not feel guilty because my boyfriend and I are not on good terms. He is the one that should feel guilty and he was not.

He called me every day. He sent me rude texts. His girlfriend saw a text he sent me and asked him what was that about. He said it was only a joke and she pressed him for an answer. She asked me if there was something going on between me and him. I made a mistake by telling her to ask him and she went silent. She did not wait until she went home. She came to my workplace, entered my office and threatened me. She called me a whore and told me to leave her man and that she would see to it that I don't get him. I was so scared, and I did not want anybody in the office to find out what was going on. She called my boyfriend and told him.

When her boyfriend realised what she was doing, he protected me and surrounded me with love. This girl called all my friends and told them I was sleeping with her boyfriend. Some of them did not believe. I told my boyfriend that I did not want him anymore, so we broke up. The man I spent the weekend with finally left his girlfriend. The friendship between herself and me broke up because, according to her, I took away her man. I don't feel guilty anymore. I know that many of the things this man told me about her are true because she shared them with me. My old boyfriend wants me back. He is nothing like this man.

Pastor, do you think I am going to be punished for what I did? I just wanted to have some fun. I did not mean to break up my girlfriend's relationship, but this man told me he always had his eyes on me. His former girlfriend lost a lot of weight, but is picking up back now. She was a good help to me, especially when I was going to university. I would like to tell her I am sorry but my present boyfriend doesn't want me to say anything to her. Over to you, Pastor.


Dear P.D.,

I want you to stop lying. You have told me an account that is not all together true. I believe that the man did call you and invited you out for the weekend and you agreed. You knew exactly what would have gone on if you were going with this man. You loved him long ago. You had your eyes on him just as how he had his eyes on you. You probably had cheated before and it was another opportunity to do so, perhaps to punish your boyfriend. You are not so innocent as you are pretending to be. I would never accept that.

You wanted to have a fling with this man and you embraced the opportunity. You wanted to get on bad. That is why you drank to excess and smoked ganja and had lots of sex. Yes, your girlfriend is right. She accused you of behaving as a whore. You don't like what she said, but when this man sent you naughty text messages you should have told him to desist from doing so. Like a fool, he sent them. He probably wanted his girlfriend to know that you got what she doesn't have or you can do what she does not do (you know what I mean). Do I have to spell out everything? Everything that happened at the hotel with you contributed to the breaking up of this man's relationship and both of you are to be blamed. If you were a good friend of this young woman, you would not have gone with this man. So stop talking nonsense about wanting to call the young woman to apologise.

You already say you are not feeling guilty anymore. So anything you say now is a big sham. Your boyfriend wants you back. If he knew the truth about you, he would keep himself quiet. And as to whether you are going to be punished for what you did to your girlfriend, time will tell. Remember, what goes around comes around.


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