Brothers against my father giving me land

September 26, 2016

Dear Pastor,

I am 30 years old and having a problem with my siblings. I am the last child for my parents. There are four of us, two boys and two girls. My boyfriend and I are teachers. I am the only child living at home.

My father has lands and he offered my boyfriend and myself a piece to build our own house. My boyfriend is 33 years old my father likes him. My two brothers say they like him, too, but they say that the lands must remain in the family name and that my boyfriend should marry me and take me somewhere else and he should not inherit anything from my father. Since hearing what they are saying, my boyfriend is not very pleased. He questions how could my own brothers fight against me? Even my father is having second thoughts. He told my boyfriend and I that he did not know my brothers would be so against us getting a portion of the land. Pastor, since my father has indicated his willingness to give us a portion of the land; my brothers are always questioning him about his will and other things.

I asked one of my brothers if they does not want me and my sisters to get anything from my father's estate. He said that what we were getting is the better part of the land and my boyfriend should provide for me elsewhere. They are so unfair because I am the only child living at home and I have to do everything for my father. Since I met my boyfriend, he helps me to get my father to the doctor and to do everything for him. My brothers' wives only visit occasionally, so I believe that I deserve to get a piece of the land, and a good portion of it too.


Dear G.L.,

I hope your father will put his foot down, so to speak, and let his sons know that he has the final word and it is his wish to give you a piece of his estate. They are out of order to be insisting that he should not do so. Whether your last name is going to change due to marriage, you are still his daughter and that cannot be changed. If your father intends to give you piece of the land, you should take him to see a real lawyer who has experience in such a matter the lawyer will advise him how to go about it. I suggest that you do not delay in dealing with this matter. The land should be surveyed and the portion that your father would love to give to you should be in your name and your husbands' name, but a lawyer will explain everything to you. Before I go, let me state that you should try not to be angry with your siblings. Many males believes that girls should not inherit much from their parents' estate. They think that their husbands are the ones who should provide for them, but females have rights too, and whether you have a man or not, you have a right to have a part of your father's estate.


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