My mom and her man had sex beside me

December 14, 2016

Dear Pastor
When I was eight years old I was living with my mother in a one room place. My father and my mother were separated.

My father told her that she should not take me with her. My mother cursed him and told him that he wanted me to live with him so he could have sex with me.

My father thumped her in her mouth and they started fighting. People in the yard had to come and separate them.

One night a man came there and my mother thought I was sleeping. 

He came into the same bed with us. I was eight at the time. The man asked my mother if I was really sleeping and she said yes.

My mother and the man started to have sex on the bed. I heard everything. Even when the bed was shaking I kept quiet.

It was only one room, so there was no other place for them to have sex. When they were finished, my mother told him that he should go.

When I got up the morning, I asked my mother if someone came into the house and she asked me why I asked.

I told her that I dreamt that somebody came to see her and she said no.

One day I went to see my father. He asked me if my mother has any man visiting her and I told him yes.

I did not mean to let down my mother. My father called her and cursed her and told her that he doesn’t want any man coming to the house because it is only one room she has. 

My mother threatened to beat me because I told my father that a man was coming to the house.

I did not tell him that they were having sex. I ran away from my mother and went to my father and he called my mother and told her that I was there.

She told him to send me home, but my father refused. He took me to my grandmother and I am still living here. I go to see my mother every two weeks.

But she said because of me, my father is not giving her anything. He is giving everything to my grandmother to support me.

Now the same man who had sex with my mother while I was on the bed is living with her and she is still blaming me. My mother hates me.

I don’t hate her, I just don’t like her. Can you imagine what my father would have done if I had told him what happened?
P. L.

Dear P. L.
Don’t blame yourself for anything. Your mother and father separated, but you were not the cause for their separation.

Your mother made a mistake when she told your father that his intention towards you was not pure. She could have simply told him that it was because she did not believe that he was capable of taking care of a girl child. 

I consider your mother very immoral. She should not have allowed her male visitor to have sex with her on the same bed as you.

I am happy that you are with your grandmother. Your mother has her faults, but please don’t abandon her.  I also hope that you would not follow her example. 

Do not leave where you are living now to go back to your mother. Please do not say anything negative about your mother to your father. 

I wish you well. 


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