My boyfriend keeps forcing me to have sex


February 27, 2017

Dear Pastor,

I am 17 years old. My mother had seven of us, and five of us belong to different fathers. It is a good thing that five are boys and only two are girls. I would never want to have children. My mother had it too hard. I am the second-to-last child and I am hoping to be an engineer when I get older. I have studied hard in school.

I have a boyfriend. I like him, but I told him that we cannot have sex. On Valentine's Day we went out and he tried to fool around me. I told him to stop and he was still trying to get me to take off my underwear. I told him I would stab him; that is when he stopped.

My friends tell me that sex is nice. How could sex be so nice when that is what caused my mother to have seven of us? I don't mean that I would never want to have sex, but not now, Pastor.

My boyfriend told me that I am "cold". He is 20 years old and he is working. He gives me money almost every week. Last night, he told me that he is thinking of stop giving me money and look for another girl because he has sexual needs and he does not intend to rape anybody, so I should tell him what I am up to.

Pastor, I love him, but I can't give into him, because I am not ready.

Am I right or wrong?


Dear Y.R.,

End the relationship with this young man and focus on your lessons. You are a very intelligent girl. No man should force a woman to have sexual intercourse with him. You have your goals and you want to achieve them. You know that sex can wait. If this young man feels that he must have sex, you should tell him to go. Stop taking his money and move on.

You have seen how your mother was used, and, as a result, she ended up having so many children. You don't want to fall into that trap, so use your head. Don't allow any man to force you to do what you don't want to do.


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