My husband always prays before sex


March 24, 2017

Dear Pastor,

I am 40 and I've been married twice. My first husband migrated and got involved with another woman, but he denied it.

After two years of marriage, he told me that I should try and find another man because the girl he got married to is a Jamaican.

My boss was interested in me all along and I kept telling him no, because I was married. He said he knew that my husband wasn't coming back.

I went out with my boss a few times, but I didn't like him as a lover and I knew he had another woman, so that relationship didn't go far.

But I gave him a little sex and he was able to help me to get a house.

He has been a good man to me up until now. I told him the truth that I didn't love him, but he didn't hold it against me. One day, his girlfriend called me and asked if we are friends.

I told her we get along very well, but he is not my boyfriend. I asked her why she asked me that question and she said it was because of the way we related to each other.


I started to see another man and because of him I attended his church. This man did not know if I am a man or a woman during the time that we were courting.

I asked him, after we were going out for six months, if we were going to have sex before we go to the altar and he said no.

He has three boys. They respect me. He is well off. Every time I mention that I am sorry I don't have children, he gets upset. I asked him if we can adopt a child and he told me no.

Before we got married, I asked my doctor if he would advise me to get pregnant at my age and he said that it would be risky but I should try.

When I told my husband what the doctor said, he told me that while he was living in America, he did a vasectomy. I was shocked and disappointed.

Every time we are about to have sex, this man prays about it. Something is wrong with this man, I swear. He prays that he would be able to maintain an erection and to satisfy me.

He prays, also, that I would not cheat on him. I asked him why he has to pray in that manner. I don't know if this is normal behaviour.

Whenever we are finished having sex, he likes to question me and ask me whether or not the sex was good. Honestly, sometimes I lie.


Dear B.O.,

The habit of your second husband is rather strange.

I do not know why this man always has to pray before having sex with you.

Anyway, the important thing is that both of you are enjoying each other. How come this man is such a Christian and did not tell you the truth about himself? He did a vasectomy.

He should not have withheld that information from you. Some may say that he did not think that you would want to have children because of your age, but I consider him very selfish.

He has deceived you and I would describe him as a pretender. A man who is endeavouring to serve the Lord should not deceive anybody, especially the woman he intended to marry.


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