My friend encouraged me to sleep with her husband

July 20, 2017

Dear Pastor,

I am writing you for your advice. I am a 37-year-old woman and I have my own home. I live alone.

I used to have a man, but for two years now we have been apart. The usual thing caught me. He went to North America and did not come back. Some of my friends told me that he got married. Up to this day he says that he didn't, but he is working and hoping that the people who employed him will help him to get his stay and to become legal.

When he calls me, he tells me not to get involved with anybody, and that I must have faith in him because he is going to come back and both of us will get married. He is two years younger than I. I have kept to myself for 18 months.

A girlfriend and her husband came to visit me and I took time off from work to be with them. They were staying at my house. We had a good time.

I knew my girlfriend was always very liberal and freaky. She said that she and her husband have an open relationship. Every opportunity her man got, he would tell me how much he loves me and that he would love to have sex with me. I kept telling him not to touch me, and that if he doesn't stop talking to me that way, I would tell his wife. But that is what she wanted to hear because one day we left him at home and went to do a little shopping, just the two of us.




I asked her if her husband is that friendly with every woman. She said I don't have to go any further because she knows that he likes me, because he told her so. She said that if I want to have sex with him it would not bother her. I was so shocked. She said I did not have to be shocked because I am not getting anything from my boyfriend, so she would turn a blind eye if I had sex with her husband. I never said another word to her. But the more I thought about it, the more eager I was to get them out of my house.

She told me that they have engaged in threesomes, so if I wanted that to happen when they were there, it could. But I never did, although I told them I will think about it.

I now have my visa and I was planning to spend two weeks in America, one with them and one with a cousin. I can't go to where my boyfriend is staying. I have dismissed staying with them because I am not prepared to get sexually involved with them.


Dear A.P.,

It appears as if you love your boyfriend very much because, according to you, you have remained faithful to him for the past two years while he is away. I am sure that you could have gotten other men since he left you.

You do not know whether he is telling you the truth, but at the same time you don't have any reason to doubt him. Therefore, I would encourage you to continue to be faithful to him. I would hope that while you are in North America, you would check him out. You don't have to stay with him, but you should endeavour to find him.

Somebody will know where he is. You should go to America unannounced and tell your cousin the situation and have arrangement made to find this man. Do not spend any time with your so-called friends who stayed at your house while they were in Jamaica. If you plan to have dinner with them, make sure someone else is with you.

You ought not to trust these folks, but at the same time, I don't expect you to tell everybody about the type of life they live and what they tried to engage you in. If you discover that your boyfriend is living with a woman, you should seriously drop him. Don't waste any more of your time waiting on him. Life is too short to waste.


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