Husband accused me of sleeping with his brother
I am 33 years old. I was married, but I am now divorced. I have two children — one is seven and the other one is nine. I am a Jamaican, but my husband is an American. My children were born in America.
My husband accused me of having a sexual relationship with his brother. His brother used to come to the house and help me while my husband would go out and gamble. He would do little errand for me. When I was not working and I didn't have any money, he would give me small loans. And every time he came by, I told my husband that he came by.
I did not know that my husband felt that we were having an affair. When he said it to me, I was shocked, and he told his brother that he should not come back to the house. Things really got out of hand when I confronted my husband. He denied telling his brother not to come back to the house unless he was there.
Pastor, having sex with his brother has never crossed my mind. His brother is married, and has a wonderful family. He takes care of his family. My worthless husband told his wife that her husband is always with me at the house, and that she should try and keep him home. He spoke to the children and asked them if uncle so and so was at the house after we had the argument.
Sometimes for three weeks my husband did not give me any money to support the house. He dresses up and leaves in the mornings, and comes home late at nights. I stopped having sex with him. I could not pay the rent so I moved out. And I am living with my sister.
Do you think it is wrong for me to divorce this man? I am a Christian. My church doesn’t believe in divorce, but I don’t want him back in my life and nothing can change my mind.
I hope that you would not allow what your church teaches to confuse you and make your life more burdensome. Your husband has been acting as a fool, and he has caused you to move out of the home that both of you shared with your children. He has made serious allegations about you. And he has tried to destroy his brother’s marriage. His attitude is wrong. He is an irresponsible man. He is not a good father.
I really cannot suggest that you return to him. Any man who does not support his children is not a good man. I strongly suggest that you take him to court for maintenance. He ought to go and get himself a job, and be a responsible father. I do not see how any good pastor of a church could tell you not to bring an end to your marriage with such a wicked man.