Pregnant matie living in my house

September 18, 2017

Dear Pastor,

This is the first time writing to you and I am doing so because I am having a problem. I am 35 years old and I am living with a man for the past 10 years. He is 45 years old. I have two children for him; one is three and the other is five.

Pastor, I am living in hell because in the same house I am living, my children's father has a girl who is living on the small side. She is pregnant for him. She is 18 years old. One day he said to me that he has to rescue a little girl who was put out of her house by her mother. I asked him if her other relatives could not help her. He said none of them had the convenience.

I suspected my boyfriend because he likes to fool around young girls. I told him that he shouldn't get involved. He said she would only be here for a short time. I said all right.

We used to rent the place and the girl came in, and when I asked my boyfriend about the rent, because I used to control the rent, he told me to give her time. After two weeks, I asked him again and he gave me $25,000. The place is generally rented for $30,000.

Every time my boyfriend came in, he checked with the girl. I asked him why he had to always check her, but he did not answer. She stayed all by herself, but she had friends visiting her and they were mostly women.

I did not know that the girl was pregnant, but one day I had the courage to ask her after I saw her hanging out clothes. Someone who knows my boyfriend called my number and told me that the girl who is living at my house is pregnant for my children's father.

 

CAN'T STAY

 

I did not wait until he got home; I knocked on the girl's door and asked her if my boyfriend and her have a relationship. She wanted to know why I asked her the question. I told her if she is pregnant for him, she can't stay in the house.

When he came home, he went straight across to her and I went behind him. We had a confrontation and he slapped me. We started to argue and he beat me up and told me to go back to my side of the house. Right there, he told me that the girl is pregnant for him and she has nowhere to live, so he had to take her.

I told him I cannot stay here with him. It's either he was going to be with me or be with her.

To show you how my man is wicked and doesn't care, that night he did not eat what I prepared and he slept all night with the girl. He came in the next morning, just to get ready to go to work.

My heart is full. I don't want to stay here anymore. He said it was a mistake he made by getting the girl pregnant, but now I am driving him fully to the girl. He didn't have to take the girl here; he could have rented somewhere else to put her. And he didn't have to tell me that he impregnated her. If he had lied that he didn't get her pregnant, I would have felt much better.

I understand that this girl was still in school when he got her pregnant.

Pastor, tell me what to do, please.

A.O.

Dear A.O.,

I suggest that you stay where you are. Don't leave but insist that this man find another place for his pregnant girlfriend to live. Evidently, the money he gave you when you questioned whether the girl was paying rent, came from him. From the beginning, he lied to you.

He probably had to take the girl away from where she was living, because her folks became aware that she got pregnant by him and refused to allow her to continue to live with them. They probably found out that you were living with him, so he told her that he would allow her to live at the apartment that was vacant.

I say stay where you are, not because I feel that it would be easy for you to tolerate this girl, but because she is separated from you and she has her own facilities. She is not interfering with you, but he is very impertinent to bring her into the house that both of you share.

It is not you who should leave; it is the girl who should do so. And if this man really respect you, he should find another place for her to go. However, I do not wish to encourage you to lower your standard by getting into confrontation with her. Don't make it easy for him by giving him the impression that you have accepted what he has done. Let him know that you are uneasy about the girl being there.

I wish you well, but don't leave.

Pastor

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