My boyfriend is molesting my sister

September 25, 2017

Dear Pastor,

I am 25 years old and I have a problem. I have a boyfriend and I am presently pregnant. I am living at home with my parents and my two younger sisters.

My boyfriend visits me every week. My parents know him. He doesn't have to hide to see me. He and I have been friends for three years.

He has helped me a lot, but what I am hearing now is very upsetting. He has become very friendly with my 15-year-old sister and I found out from my other sister that my boyfriend is always calling and talking to her.

Two years ago, my youngest sister told me that my boyfriend fondled her and she spoke to the sister who talks up to him; she told her to keep quiet and not to complain to me.

I cannot believe that my boyfriend, who is 25, would stoop so low to molest my sisters.

I asked my sister whether it was true that my boyfriend fondled her and she said it only happened once. I asked her why she never reported it to me and she didn't answer, but my other sister told me that she said that she is not going to tell me because whenever he does it, she feels nice.

I called my boyfriend in the presence of the girls and asked him, and he denied it.

Pastor, I don't know what to do.


Dear T.J.,

Your boyfriend could get himself into serious trouble if he continues to molest young girls. He has no respect for you. He needs professional help; he cannot be trusted among young girls.

Evidently, your sister and him have been playing around and that is why she says that she likes when he fondles her.

I don't know what you are going to do. But I do know that your sisters should not be around him at all whenever he comes to the house. He has to have psychological help to overcome his addiction.

Whether you leave him or stay with him, he is going to need to receive help. He is going to continue to play with underage girls, even if you warn him.

He must answer the question: Why does he have that desire to fondle young girls? How often does he feel that compulsion? Bear in mind that it is important for you to know that there can be something in his childhood that has developed.

Your sister needs to be told that although she enjoyed what your boyfriend did to her, it is wrong and his behaviour cannot be taken lightly.

Therefore, you need to speak sternly to your man and let him know that you will not tolerate such behaviour from him and he must receive professional help.

If he refuses to seek help, you should tell him that you are going to end the relationship with him.


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