I can't get over this cheater

November 06, 2017

Dear Pastor,

I really need your advice. I am 19 years old. I am living in the United States of America. I am currently attending college. I am seeing this guy for about four months now. We met at a party. He was very sweet and nice. We started to talk over the phone every day and every night. I started to fall for him, so we had sex. It was so amazing. I know I am too young to be talking this way, but this is how I feel.

We had sex three times for the week. He treats me like I am his queen. He even helps me with the things I need in school because my mother doesn’t do anything for me. I work and pay for my classes. Whenever we go out, he tells people that I am his wife or I am his woman. I really do love him and I know he feel the same way too, but he was too good to be true.

In September I found out that he was cheating. He had a relationship with another girl for about a year. My heart was broken into pieces. I tried to break things off between us but he won’t leave me alone. Whenever I block his number from messaging me or try to avoid his calls, he tried to get in contact with me in a different way. He even shows up at my house sometimes.

Pastor, I really do love this guy. I was an unhappy girl and he brought joy in my life. Every morning I wake up, he’s the first person on my mind and whenever I am going to sleep, he’s the last person on my mind. Every time I talk about his girlfriend, he gets mad and starts to argue with me. I told him that he needs to choose between his girlfriend and myself and that I am not going to wait any longer on his answer because I look too good to be anyone’s side chick .

Pastor, please, tell me what I should do.
S.B.

Dear S.B.,
This man knows that you do not seriously want to break up with him. He knows that you have gotten to love him, and you are grateful for his help. And whenever you tell that the relationship is ended between the both of you, it is like telling him a big joke. If you wanted this man out of your life you would not take any more of his money. And you would not accept any of his phone calls or welcome him back at your house. If you seriously did not want him in your life, there wouldn’t be any further room for argument.

I recognize that you are young and this man is taking advantage of you; therefore, you should tell your parents that you are no more interested in him and you have told him not to visit you. So, they should speak to him on your behalf. An older brother (if you have one), is a good person to tell this guy to leave you alone.
If he persists in pursuing you, you should speak to a lawyer, and take out an injunction against him. I wish you well.

 

Pastor

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