My crush used me for a one-night stand

February 21, 2018

Dear Pastor,

I'm a teenage girl and I really need your advice. I met a guy that I like, but I am not sure that he likes me. We only talk sometimes, but not for long.

One night he called me and asked if he could come over to my house to visit me. I told him yes. When he came to the house, he kissed me and asked me where my room was.

I showed him my room. I didn't know what he had in mind. I didn't know anything sexual would happen, but it didn't take me long to realise that he intended to have sex with me.

When I caught myself, we were having sex. He took my virginity then he went away. It was not like we were lovers and were dating. It was a very stupid thing for me to do. He had a girlfriend.

He came over because he wanted sex and his girlfriend wasn't available that night. Although he tricked me, I still like him. I can't stop talking to him.

I want to have a relationship with him, but I don't want what he did to me to happen again.

I don't know what to do. I felt close to him because he was the one who took my virginity. I don't feel like he used me. Please answer me and pray for me.

Initial Withheld.


You were very naive when this young man asked whether he could come over to your house and you agreed. He took that as an opportunity to have sex with you. You didn't see it that way.

You thought that he was a gentleman and he would only be around with you to keep your company. You are fortunate that he did not get you pregnant.

You wanted him to have a lasting relationship with you, but he only wanted a one-night stand.

You have not yet learnt from your mistake because you are still hoping that he would leave his girlfriend and come to you.

I must tell you that if you continue to show interest in him and he gets another opportunity, he will come back and have sex with you again and walk away.

So, consider what happened as a big mistake and try your best to take your mind off this guy.


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