Fed up with my cheating boyfriend

March 01, 2018

Dear Pastor,

This is my first time writing to you, but I am a regular reader of your column. I even follow you on social media. I am 20 years old, and my boyfriend is 30 years old. We have been together for almost five years. He was my first.

I strongly believe that this man has been cheating on me for years. He doesn't take me out, and whenever I ask him to do so, he complains about not having a car. He only gives me money if I ask. I'm not the kind of person who enjoys asking men for things, and he knows that.

I'm attending evening classes at the moment. In my community, there are many farmers, so I do a lot of days' work. This man says that he's a life-loving person. He goes to parties every night. He doesn't have any children as yet, and I don't have any either.




I visited him a few nights ago, and we got into a fight the second night that I was there. He was texting a female, and I saw him send her a kiss emoji with a heart. He put a female's name on his WhatsApp status. I asked who she was, and he told that me it was his cousin who had just got married. And, Pastor, it was the same girl that he had sent the kiss-heart emoji to.

Pastor, I know a guy who is living abroad, and I have been dreaming about him. I want him in my life. He is not living in Jamaica, but I still have feelings for my cheating boyfriend.

I left my boyfriend's house after I saw the text that he had sent to the girl. It was midnight, but I still left. He didn't even try to stop me or talk me out of it. I have to take two taxis from his house to get to mine. But, thanks to God, I was lucky enough to see the police passing. They asked if I wanted a ride, and they took me home. Now, he's sending a lot of 'explanation' text messages to my phone. He is telling me that me loves me very much, thats he need me, that he will never stop loving me, etc.

I'm wondering if he is doing this because he knows that my dad is living in England, I will be leaving Jamaica soon, and my mom owns and operates a small business.

Some years ago, he did something dirty to me. I decided to leave him, but we made up and got back together. I was trying my very best to stay away from him even though it was really hard to do so. Then, he got into an accident and was seriously hurt. I visited him every day in the hospital. I carried fruits and juices for him and fed him. That is what allowed me to meet his family. They are very nice people. His dad passed away last year.

I await for your advice. Thank you for your time.

Miss Fed Up

Dear Miss Fed Up,

You are not fed up with this man. If you were very serious about leaving him, you would have done so already. He has nothing to offer, and you should know that. He is getting so much more out of you, so he would stick around. I can't encourage you to continue this relationship. He is fooling you. He is a time waster. Move on.


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