I can't stop fornicating
I am a frequent reader of your column, and I find it very interesting. I've being wanting to write to you for some time now. I'm a young Christian woman. I've been saved for a couple of years. I've prayed for a husband a couple of times. I don't know if God has answered or not. My high school friend has reappeared in my life, and I must say that although he is awesome, he is not baptised like I am.
I know it's not right, but I love him. He knows that I love him, but I don't know what is holding him back from getting saved. He is always encouraging people to get saved. He is like a counsellor. He always tries to bring out the best in me.
We got carried away and had sex. Then, it kept happening again and again. I know it's a sin. I don't know what to do. I love him. I've tried to end the relationship more than once, but we keep getting back together. There's just something about this guy. He says he loves me, and I believe him because he shows it. I am awaiting your advice.
If you and this young man are so in love, and both of you have been having sex, why is it that you don't get married? That is the best thing to do. It is either you are going to get married and not feel guilty about having sex or you are going to break up forever. You cannot force this man to marry you. It does not even make sense to tell him that if you don't have sex with him, you will leave him, because he will only laugh at you, considering that you have had sex with him over and over.
Therefore, I am suggesting that you try your very best to reason with him and to show him that you have done what you never expected to do. If he truly loves you, he should either marry you or set you free so that you will not carry a guilty conscience every day. Tell him that you are willing to have a private ceremony if he doesn't have the money to have a big wedding.
Tell him also that you wrote to me, and I replied saying that I am willing to do the ceremony for free.