Girlfriend thinks my neighbour is trying to ‘tie’ me

March 11, 2019

Dear Pastor,

I have a lady friend, but we are not living together. She visits me on a regular basis. But I have a new neighbour who is also visiting me. She and I are not in a relationship. My lady friend is very jealous, and she does not like to see my neighbour visiting me. I try to tell her that nothing is going on between us, but she doesn't believe.

One Friday evening, my neighbour brought me some soup, and my lady friend was there. When the woman was gone, my lady friend took the soup and threw it away. She told me not to allow her to come back and take any more soup because she can make me soup if I want soup.

Pastor, I was so angry. That is food, and nobody should waste food like that. The woman and I have never gone to bed. It is not that type of friendship, but my lady friend said that she doesn't know what she put into it, and it might be something to 'tie' me. From the time she threw away the soup, my mind started to change from her.

My lady friend has four children - they are all big; the last one is 22. My children are also grown up. I am a pensioner, and I get money from places that I have rented. I don't hide anything from her, so I believe it's my money that she is watching. She is afraid I will take my money and give to this woman. I am so angry. I told her not to come back, but she is still coming. The bad thing about this relationship is that I love her.

Please, tell me what to do.


Dear J.S.,

Your lady friend went too far, much too far. She feels insecure. She does not believe that a man can have a woman as a social friend. She believes that he must go to bed with her. She is so wrong, and she went too far when she threw away the soup that the woman brought for you. It is a Jamaican custom to make soup on weekends, and the lady knows that you are a single man, so she brought some for you. Your lady friend passed her place when she threw away the soup, and then she told you that the woman might be trying to tie you.

I don't need to tell you that she is a foolish woman, but I am not going to encourage you to end the relationship with her. Both of you have to deal with this matter. Both of you are adults. She is overly jealous, but do not break up the friendship with your neighbour, either. You are living alone, and anything can happen to you and you have to call on your neighbour for help.


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