My man is ignoring me

October 18, 2019

Dear Pastor,

I am writing to you to get some advice, especially because you're a family counsellor and a man who is experienced and educated.

I have been with my man for almost three years. At the beginning of our relationship, he did things that led me to disbelieve him up to this day.

Before he left Jamaica, he tried to prove to me that he was faithful and doing the right thing.

He has been away from Jamaica for a year and seven months and our relationship has got so much harder. Sometimes it's okay and another time it's rocky.

I used to hear from him very often earlier on when he just left, but after awhile, I started to hear from him only once in a while.

We were talking the other night after two weeks, because I kept telling him that I wanted to hear from him more often and he insisted that he couldn't make that possible, so it turned into an argument.

He is saying that things are not easy for him in the US and sometimes he doesn't want to talk to anyone.

Pastor, I understand that. But two to three weeks of not hearing from the person I love is not ok for me.

I don't really know what's going on in his life anymore, because I'm not hearing from him. He says nothing has changed from his side.

Am I selfish? Or am I negative for complaining of wanting to hear from him more often? I feel our relationship is going down the drain, and I know he loves me, because he has proven that to me many times.

But all I want is to hear from him since I'm not seeing him anymore. Pastor, can you tell me whether I should let him 'breathe' or am I being too selfish?

Please, give me your advice. Thank you.

V.B.

Dear V.B.,

A man cannot be too busy to talk to his girlfriend or his wife even once or twice a week for a short period. This man is talking nonsense.

On the other hand, if you wish to give him the benefit of the doubt, let him have his way, because you can't force a man to love you or to talk to you.

Pastor

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