Love triangle with two sisters

July 09, 2020

Dear Pastor,

I have been reading your column often and listening to you on the radio. You are a man with an open mind and you are not afraid of criticism. I am having a problem. I am having an affair with two sisters, but I am only in love with one of them. I used to hide and visit one of them when we just started out but it did not take long for the other sister to suspect me. By that time I was having sex with both of them. So we all talked about it and each of them said that they did not want to leave me. So we all started to sleep together without any fuss.

Pastor, it is kind of funny but these women treat me well and I treat them well. I was once married and I have three children, but my wife and I are divorced. These two sisters had nothing to do with the breaking up of my wife and myself. I am 61 years old; I don't intend to get married again. I had two houses I agreed that my wife should have one so she has that for herself. She has a very good job and she does not harass me.

My children know that I have a girlfriend but they don't know that it is not one but two. And that these girls are sisters. As I said, I love one of them and the other, I am with her to satisfy her sexual needs. I talked to them about their future and none of them want to leave me. The good thing about my situation is that I don't have to hide from them. They are all busy people but on Sundays we have dinner together.


These women don't need any financial help from me; it is not that type of relationship. They can support themselves and both of them are in their 40s. If we go out they go together, but I drive my own car. I have someone who comes in and takes care of the house, such as doing the cleaning and the washing and so on. She is a woman my age and these women really like her and buys her gifts. She has been working with me for seven years.

Both of these women are not interested in having children. They know they can break up the relationship but they are not interested in leaving me. My children are encouraging my wife and myself to get back together. She regrets divorcing me, maybe perhaps that is the only way the love affair with these two sisters and I will end. I am really contemplating reconciling with my wife, if she would have me.

I ask you for your opinion.


Dear P,

This is indeed a very strange world. These sisters say they are quite comfortable with both of them having intimate relationship with you. But you know that only one of them you would consider yourself being in love with. You are only facilitating the other, as you say to satisfy her sexual needs. I get the impression by reading your letter that although these women say they are comfortable with this situation you are not.

You are not a young man and you ought to know that this is not fair to these women. You have told them you are interested in getting married but at the same time you mentioned that your children are trying to get your ex-wife and yourself back together. Would you not consider yourself to be very selfish? If you know that there is a possibility that your wife and yourself may be reconciled, why not let these women know that you are thinking about doing so. Therefore, it would be wise for them to end this love triangle.

I wish not to judge you but I do believe that you are special to have two sisters loving you and having sex with you at the same time. You know what you are doing is not right and that is why when all three of you plan to attend a function, you don't travel together in the same vehicle because you do not wish anyone to suspect that you are intimately involved with the two women. I believe that you know that if you were to try and leave one of them for the other 'hell bruk loose'. These women will not only turn against you but against each other. But I would encourage you to consider ending this love triangle. Do so while you are physically strong enough to fight them off. I know you are not emotionally strong. You say these women don't want your money so I am assuming, therefore, that what they want is sex and companionship.

Perhaps what you should do is tell them that there should be a trial separation among all three of you. And that would encourage them to try and date other men. Try that and let me know how it is working out.


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