Thought I had the perfect boyfriend

August 03, 2020

Dear Pastor,

I need your help to decide if I am making the right choice. I am 23 years old and my boyfriend is 25. I had not been in a relationship for three years because I did not want to rush into one. I always prayed and asked God to send me the right guy.

One day in January 2019, I got sad and started crying, and asking God why he was taking so long to send me the right guy. My friends and co-workers always talked about their partners and I always felt left out.

So I kept praying until one day I saw a message on Facebook from a guy. Normally I would not respond to a person who messages me on Facebook, but that night I did. The guy texted and I asked, "Who sent you?"

They guy replied by saying "LOL", and responded by saying "God". Because he said that, my emotions shifted. I was saying to myself, "God, is this the guy I have been praying for?" I continued to text him and I realised that he is a nice person.

Four months after, I decided to be in a relationship with him. Everything was going well until one day I was at work and my co-workers were talking about their men.

I was able to join in the conversation and I told them about this guy I met and I was boasting that he would never cheat on me because he is not that type of guy.

My co-worker looked at me and said, "Never trust a man who works in the police force or army, they will kill you with 'bun'."

One day my WhatsApp was not working on my phone, so I texted my boyfriend and told him that a WhatsApp code would be sent to his phone and he should send me the code and I would be using his number to log in on WhatsApp quickly.

Then I realised that something strange was happening with the WhatsApp. I realised that I was receiving all his messages on my phone, and these messages were from different females.

So I pretended to be him and texted the women after going deep into conversation. One had been in a relationship with him after four months. I called him and confronted him with it; he could not explain himself.

A few weeks passed and he contacted me, saying that he was sorry. I forgave him and we got back together. I still cannot trust him. He has a so-called best friend and he is always putting her photographs on his posts.

I asked him why he had to do that and he stopped posting our pictures on his status. I ended the relationship with him last month. I am a very faithful and honest girl when it comes to a relationship.

Now I am so sad, I just want to be with the right person. He texted me multiples times but I did not respond. I am young and beautiful and I can get any man I want.

But I am not the type to cheat. Please pray for me so I may get the right person that God may desire that I have.


Dear S.R.,

Don't be mad with me but I am going to tell you the truth, you are not smart. I hope that you will not make yourself such a fool to any other man.

All this argument about WhatsApp and what you did and so on has exposed you. You should know much better how to relate to a man on a social media platform. Some men are wicked and are seeking naive women like yourself.

You are only 23, why do you think God is taking too long to give you a man? Utter nonsense. It is because you think that you are too pretty to wait on God why you have got yourself into a very messy situation.

I hope that you would learn not to trust men who have 'oily tongues'. Don't forget that generally speaking, men are liars.


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