Commentary

Where is the real rain?

JACKASS SEY DI worl' no level. Jackass sey de rain in Jamaica naa fall eena de right place dem.

On Sunday, the sky over Kingston looked very promising. There were clouds - dark clouds - blocking out the sunlight that normally pelts the concrete jungle and it was looking nice and gloomy. Rain at last, Jackass and human alike though, rain at last.

Rain at last for real; Kingston got the last piddling droplets of the showers. It was like some really big person, with a really whazoozy (whether the outdoor or indoor pipe cock type) dribbled the last droplets of last night's water intake over the capital.

But Jackass had cause to go to Ocho Rios on Sunday night and it was a different thing entirely. Fern Gully was a literal gutter, with water running down like the fabled eight rivers had resurfaced at the top of the hill and were heading pell mell to the sea.

On the way down, Spanish Town was dry. Through the Bog Walk Gorge was dry. Past Ewarton, same thing. Going up Mount Rosser there was some sound of moisture on the donkey shoes. Through Faiths Pen there was sprinkling on the glasses and in Moneague the skies were open.

At the same time, a friend called Jackass and said Falmouth was 'washing away'.

The world - and rain - is not level at all. Kingston is as dry as the mouth of somebody with a hangover, but the rain does not fall there. Sure, the drought hit St. Ann and the entire North Coast as well, but Kingston (and Portmore) was a different case in dryness. But where did the rain fall most?

Inevitable rainfall

You got it already.

But it gets even more unlevel. The drought is one thing, but when the rain comes, there is the flooding. Now, Jackass would like to believe that the authorities have the foresight to clean the gullies and drains, at least on the major thoroughfares and flood prone areas, while the sun is hot and the going is good. But no; it is a guarantee that the inevitable rainfall will result in flooded city streets and general misery.

In Bushman's song 'Downtown', he notes that "a eight million dem spen pon Hope Road/an de floodin' no en' same way". (That is US$8 million, by the way, or just about J$$240 million, OK). A road is for driving on, whether it is raining or not, and it is incredible to believe that a boat is better suited to certain roads in the capital when it rains.

There is thing about making your own bad luck, though, and the people in Kingston have done a pretty good job of creating drought conditions by chopping down the trees and putting up concrete boxes of various sizes and grandeur in their stead. It is not only a matter of eliminating the green spaces; it is where. Chancery Hall, Jacks Hill, Long Mountain and such the like were places that helped bring rain to the city when they actually had trees. Townhouses and mansions in these locations are always advertised with 'views'; yes, views of the dryness they have helped to create.

Jackass sey di worl' no level. Jackass sey rain fi fall eena town too, but do, no flood e.