Tell Me Pastor

Praying for acceptance

Dear Pastor,

I am 22, living in the United States of America (US) for the past 10 years. I moved from Jamaica and I miss it very much.

I was 16 when I got involved with a 23-year-old man. In the beginning, I hid our relationship from my parents until I was 18.

After they found out his age, they didn't want me to see him anymore. But I disobeyed them and continued seeing him. We now have an 18-month-old baby girl.

I am currently in school studying to become a nurse. My man and I are engaged and my parents aren't pleased with my decision to marry him.

Respectful

I am deeply in love with this man. He takes care of our daughter and treats me with respect. He is now 29 and is in his last year of college. His major is computer science.

I want to let my parents know that I am sorry for being disrespectful in the beginning, but this man is my soulmate. Pastor, Can you please help me show my parents that he is the right one for me? Thank you.

T. F.,

New York, USA

Dear T. F,

Your parents are aware that you have decided to continue the relationship with this man. If in the beginning they objected to the relationship because of his age, they would have come to realise now that both of you are determined to build your future together, not only for yourselves but for your daughter.

If you have a good rapport with your father, you should talk to him about your decisions when both of you are alone. You should let him know that when you were younger you did some silly things but that you are in love with your child's father and that you are begging him for his blessings. He will tell you how he feels. Don't argue with him.

Whether he says good things or bad things about your fiancé, make sure that you hug him and tell him that you love him and will always respect him.

Talk to your mother when both of you are alone. Let her know what your child's father has been doing and what he has been saying to you and ask her how she feels about him.

Mothers like to talk to their girls about family life. Some are cagey about certain subjects. You should know your mother. Open up to her if she opens up to you, but make sure you ask her for guidance. Let her know that the young man wants to marry you.

Pastor.