Tell Me Pastor

Meet the mother

Dear Pastor,

I was raised in a strict Christian Jamaican household. I was not allowed to date, but I found ways to do so when I was in high school. Now I am in college, and I have been dating a guy for the past five months. I really love him. He feels the same about me and has introduced me to his family. They love me and have accepted me as their own.

Caring

He has brought me to church, and he helps me with my school work. He also takes care of me when I am sick. He is very caring and respectful. He even cooks for me. We had sex, but my mom would not be happy about that.

I have introduced him to my cousins and siblings, and they all love him. They suggested I introduce him to my mother. I would love to do so, but I am afraid of her reaction. I know if she met him, she would love him and I do think that introducing him to her is the right thing to do. However, I also know she might flip and chop up the two of us.

What should I do?

S.B.,

Washington DC

Dear S.B.,

You should introduce your boyfriend to your mother. You would not want her to hear from somebody else that you have a boyfriend. Your cousins and siblings know him so they may one day talk about it, and she may hear and become very upset that you did not tell her about him. You should not be too concerned about her reaction. You should tell her that there is somebody interested in you, and you would like her to meet him and tell you how she feels about him.

I hope you would be wise not to have unprotected sex. If you are determined to have sex with this young man, make sure that you protect yourself, and make sure you don't do anything that will cause you not to remain focused.

Pastor.