Tell Me Pastor

A means to an end

DEAR PASTOR,

I need your advice. I have been living in New York for the past eight years and my husband lives in Jamaica. I visit on a yearly basis.

My problem is this. I have two young children for my husband and all the years I have been here I have to be telling him to send money to help support them. He doesn't take the initiative without me literally riding his back before he sends it.

My family thinks he is a dead beat and I should divorce him. Sometimes I share their opinion because of his lack of interest in supporting his children. He is a professional, so he has the ability to provide. This is a major drawback in our marriage. He says whenever we are living together, everything will be okay. I don't think that is going to make him be more supportive.

P.T., New York, New York

Dear P. T.,

Your children will never forget that their father did not support them. They will talk about it when they grow up and they will hold that against him. It is not too late however for him to come to his senses and do his part.

I am sorry you did not mention what type of work he does. I don't know if you are aware that you can take him to court for maintenance. You will have to appear in court in Jamaica. I suggest that you talk to a lawyer who is practising in Jamaica to assist you. Before you do, you should inform your husband of your intention.

Pastor