Dear Counsellor:
I recently found out that I have Pelvic Inflammatory Disease (PID). My doctor told me I might never be able to have children. I need to tell my husband about this infection but I'm afraid. How do I tell my husband? Should I tell him?
Worried wife
Dear Worried Wife:
People often do tell their partners about their infection with Pelvic Inflammatory Disease (PID), and many have found their partners to be supportive and understanding. Before you talk to your husband about PID make sure that you know the basic facts about PID and have the correct information.
The discussion you will have with your husband should take place somewhere that you feel safe and comfortable such as during dinner at home, or any other quiet place.
Try to be confident and natural, and speak calmly and clearly while looking your husband in the face. This may be difficult, but your delivery affects your message. The more comfortable you are, and the more positive your attitude, the more positive his response is likely to be.
Your husband may react in a number of ways. Some people overreact, while others will not be upset. However, just as it probably took you some time to accept and understand your diagnosis, so will your husband need some time to think through what you told him.
TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF
Dear Counsellor:
I recently found out that I'm HIV infected. I am doing fine now, no sickness at all, but I am very scared and worried. Is there anything special I should do? What about my health?
D.K.
Dear D.K.
AIDS AFFAIRS is sorry to hear about your infection with HIV. The most effective weapon you have against HIV the virus that causes AIDS is knowledge, understanding how the virus progresses and operates, learning how to monitor your health and staying informed of your treatment options. A very important step you need to take is to find a doctor who is HIV-knowledgeable.
You must also be aware of the number of resources available to you. You can ask your family doctor, request information from your local health department or contact the National AIDS/STD Helpline.
Your doctor can be a good source of information, but you should be proactive in staying up to date on drugs therapies and treatment options. Don't be afraid to ask questions and discuss treatment strategies with your doctor, this is an important step in taking charge of your health.
Emotional support is also very important. There are a number of HIV/AIDS support groups, which can offer assistance in dealing with the many new aspects of life after you have tested positive. Perhaps you should seek to interact with people who are going through or have been through a similar experience as this can be an invaluable experience.
Please note that many people continue to live healthy, happy lives after testing positive for HIV. The bottom line is that testing positive for HIV is not a death sentence (it does not mean that you are going to die right away or very soon). Treating your body well, following your doctor's instructions and maintaining good mental health are simple steps you can take to manage your health. Different things work for different people; find out what works for you and do it.
BOTH SHOULD GET TESTED
Dear Counsellor:
My boyfriend and I had a discussion recently. We decided that we would be very open with each other. We talked about our sexual past. However, some of what he told me is bothering me, even though I told him it wouldn't bother me. He told me he had sex with men in the past, but gave that up when a close friend of his died from AIDS. He also told me that he has never been tested for HIV, as he is afraid to do so. Do you think I should get tested for AIDS?
J.J.
Dear J.J.
AIDS AFFAIRS is glad you and your boyfriend were able to have a frank talk about your sexual past. You must remember that HIV, the virus that causes AIDS, is not restricted to men who have sex with men (homosexuals) or to any specific group for that matter. Anyone can get HIV/AIDS. Therefore, if you have unprotected sex, that is sex without a condom, you stand a chance of getting HIV. Persons who have many sex partners are at greater risk, even when they use condoms, because condoms can break. You should speak with your health care provider about getting tested.
You should also encourage your partner about getting tested. It is important for persons starting new relationship to get tested for sexually transmitted infections including HIV since they have had sexual partners in the past.
Please remember that if you use a condom every time you have sex you will reduce your chance of becoming infected with HIV and other sexually transmitted infections (STIs).
For more information on condom use, HIV/AIDS and other sexually transmitted infections call the AIDS/STD Helpline at 967-3830, 967-3764 or toll free at 1-888-991-4444 or write to AIDS Affairs, c/o THE STAR 7 North Street, Kingston.
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