DEAR PASTOR,
I've been married for the past 17 years, but my husband and I have been separated for 12 years. The problem is I'm a Christian and I have no intention of getting back together with my husband.
I left my husband because he was abusive. We shared three children ages 18, 16, and 15. I have two other children ages 10 and seven but they do not belong to him. I got pregnant for him at age 14. We were Christians. I had my first child at age 15 and got pregnant again at 16. We got married when I was pregnant at 16. The pastor told us that he couldn't perform the marriage with out my parents' consent. I grew up with my mom, my father was out of the picture. My mom didn't hesitate to write a letter to the pastor telling him she was o.k. with the decision so he could go ahead and marry us. We got no counselling whatsoever.
BLAMING MOM
I blame my mom for that irresponsible decision. I thought I was doing the right thing then but when I look back at it now, I know I was so wrong. I wish my mother had put up some resistance. I left my second children's father because I'm a Christian once more. We would have been married if I was not married. I am scared the Lord wouldn't accept my second marriage.
Please advise me on what to do. Should I get my divorce and remarry? Will the Lord accept my second marriage? Was it wrong for a 16-year old girl to get married especially for the sake of pregnancy? We got married because we wanted to stay in church. I await your advice.
A. D., Hanover, Jamaica
Dear A. D.,
Perhaps, your mother was afraid that if she had objected the young man and you would have kicked up a "stink."
Concerning the matter of divorce and remarriage, I would urge you to seek a divorce without delay. I further suggest that you call the Legal Aide clinic and make an appointment to see them about the matter. I believe that you should remarry if this other man is willing to marry you. I wish you well.
Pastor
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