DEAR PASTOR,
I was in love with my ex -Jamaican man 12 years ago. He cheated all through-out the relationship, so I finally left him alone. He introduced me to one of his friends and right away we were attracted to each other, but I always respected my relationship at the time. We were all friends and we would all be at the same house everyday without any disrespect. My ex got deported and his friend would call me from time to time and even visit. The visit was a respectable one. However, when he calls he's always coming on strong. I didn't like him coming on to me.
MOVED CLOSER
After about 13 years of knowing my friend, I moved closer to him. He would call or see me and he would always know about what is going on in my life. I asked him why he was always seeking information about me, but he did not give me a direct answer. Anyway, we got together after I moved in the same area where he lives. He told me that it was destiny for me to be moving so close to him finally. Of course he's married.
ALWAYS CHEATED
Since I've known him, he has always cheated on his wife, but some how I finally got intimate with him. I told him this is not right because I was in a serious relationship with his friend and he knew I was dedicated to his friend.
I asked him what would my boyfriend in Jamaica think. He said he would be happy for us since he is in Jamaica and we are in California.
He told me not to worry, so I slept with him two times. The very first time was at he and his wife's home while she was out of town. The second time we did it in his van. I felt so bad because I knew I was wrong for sleeping with my ex's close friend in his wife's house. I wouldn't want that to happen to me.
AVOIDING MY CALLS
Since I last slept with him, he has been avoiding my calls and coming up with excuses such as "I'll call you back" or "I'm going through some problems right now."
. I feel like he got what he wanted and that was it. I think we were supposed to have a better relationship than that.
We were cool before we slept with each other. I regret sleeping with him, but I think about him all the time and finding my emotions getting caught up. I'm missing him and wish he would call me soon and tell me why he's distanced himself from me. I miss him so much
I wish he could at least come see me and tell me the truth even if it hurts. At least I can put a closure to another dog. I go to sleep thinking about him and wake up the same way thinking about him. I never wanted to feel this way. I am always wondering what he's thinking. I feel like a fool.
D. G., California, USA
Dear D. G.,
Please pray about the matter as often as you can. Let this man go. You knew that this relationship could not last. You are right, he got what he wanted. But, he probably has come to realise that he may lose his wife if he continues to see you. Consider what has happened between you and this man as a big mistake and move on with your life.
You can get to know new people in the area in which you live if you attend church and introduce yourself to the pastor and other members of the church. They will help to take care of you. May God bless you and help you to overcome your problems.
Pastor
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