Dear Pastor,

I was with a guy for about 6 months and everything was good. I found myself falling in love with him. I told him and he said he had the same feelings towards me. Every day he asks me how I feltl about him and I would tell him that I care a lot and he would feel good. When I asked him about me he said if he didn't care about me, he wouldn't have been with me. He was a good person. In my eyes, he was loving, caring and helpful. He would come to my house and clean and help me with house chores.

He went to another state to spend some time. But while he was there, he only called me twice to say he was coming home. It was then I realised that he was in another state. He claimed that he went to look for his cousin on his way back. From his return, we just fell apart. We had no sex for four months and we didn't even talk to each other. He didn't call with an explanation or anything. I love this guy with all my heart. Now we see each other if he wants his hair to be braided, needs money and to have sex. I think he is using me because he knows that I love him.

Please, pastor, I need your advice.

N.B., New York, USA

Dear N.B.,

You have allowed yourself to be used by him and he continues to do so. If he had any respect for you at all, he would not have done what you have accused him of doing. It is evident that he is not speaking the truth.

Pastor

No man can be too busy to communicate with the one he says he loves and if your man only wants you to comb his hair, give him money and have sex with you, he is not one you should be proud of. You are wasting your time having him as your man.

Pastor