Dear Pastor,

I have been with a man for two years. We have never spent any time together and he doesn't give me any money, but I give him money. He disrespects me in front of his friends and beats me up. I love him. He doesn't want me to have any male friends, but he has all these girlfriends. He cheated on me four times. He has three kids whom I love dearly, and I have grown attached to them.

My daughter needs a caring stepfather. I really, really love him and he says after his financial problems are over, everything will be ok and later we will get married. I am the type of person who doesn't want to be with every single man on Earth. He is my second man. I really want to know what I should do.

Please, pastor, give me an answer.

J.J., Florida, U.S.A.

Dear J.J.,

I don't know why you would want to be with a man who abuses you. That doesn't make sense to me. All abusers should be reported and face the court. No woman should allow a man to take such liberty with her. I really can't encourage you to accept the nonsense this man is carrying on, and if he proposes to you, you should ask him to go with you for counselling. But, I repeat, I don't know why you would want to be with a man who is an abuser.

Pastor