Dear Pastor,

I am a 19-year-old young woman dating a 42-year-old man. He stresses me out a lot because he is very possessive. He does not want me to go out with my friends because he thinks that when I am out with my friends, they will influence me to do bad things. He is always accusing me of cheating on him. He calls my phone constantly to the point that when I don't have any credit on my phone, he tops it up every time for me to not have any excuse for not calling him. The truth is I really love this man. He gives me everything I want, but if he continues to stress me out, I will be forced to leave him.

What do you think, Pastor?

K. M., Kingston, Jamaica

Dear K. M.,

This man is not going to change. Believe me, he will not. He is much older than you and he feels that you are going to find a younger man and leave him. I suppose you are with him because of what you get from him.

I suggest that you tell him that if he doesn't stop being so possessive, the relationship will indeed end. Tell him how you feel and tell him he has to learn to trust you. Tell him to allow you to go out with your friends from time to time.

Pastor