The Jamaica Star :: Commentary :: 'Ease' up nuh?

Jackass sey di worl' no level. Jackass sey oonu fe ease up easing an ease off people when dem ease off a ting.

So last week Jackass talked about the way people who have good manners and sound off a warning when they ease off something from the tailpipe are often looked on as having bad manners, when in fact they are showing the best manners under the circumstances. It is the people who let it go silently and then disown it on top of that who are the real louts around here.

But it is not only the attitude towards a loud ease that stinks; it is the attitude to the ease itself. For while it is 'easy' to pour scorn on that bodily function there are so many things related to the human body that are 'high', but just don't get the same treatment.

Take sneezing. Particles of phlegm, nasal hair, good old booger and maybe a bit of last week's curry goat that was lodged in the back of the throat flying in the air at 40 miles an hour. But crack one and chances are someone will say 'bless you'. Bless who? Nah man. Because no matter how the mouth is covered something must fly into the atmosphere.

Let one go and noone will say 'nasty!'.

Let a loud ease go, though, and the expression can be easily read.

Internal pollution

Another one of those body functions that don't get the 'dis' is burping. Or belching, depending on the volume. Think about it. Displaced air coming from the depths of the gut, all musty and rusty and dusty, with the flavour of not only the meal that just went down but also those that have been down there for a while. Up and up and up it comes, then out into the mouth, can't be all that clean either, since the meal is being consumed, and into the air to add to the pollution load.

And what do people generally say? "Yes man, belly full."

There are other things that might not get compliments, but at the same time do not get the same level of scorn and disgust. There are picking the nose in public and bursting bumps (some people love to see the puss and blackheads just ooooooozing out), among others.

So why, Jackass wonders, this unfair treatment meted out to the ease? And then I got it.

It is the bottom. If ease was coming from the side, the head top or the shin it would not get the same treatment.

But if you think Jackass is going to say the world is not level towards bottom, because it is as vital as hand and tongue and knee, think again. Is Jackass oonu tink gwine get mix up in dem ting dere, when tourism boycott did threaten an' man a fin' dead a yard wid no sign of forced entry cause a 'friend' was dere?

Hmm. Dat mean sey im let im een dem.

Jackass sey di worl' no level. Jackass sey oonu fi ease offa ease still.