Dear Pastor,

I live in Florida and in December a friend introduced me to one of her friends who lives in New York. We talk on the phone non-stop. It is as if we put each other to bed and wake each other in the mornings. I thought this was my soul mate. I really cared about him. While we were involved, I went back and forth to visit him. I did not know that he was so jealous and insecure. I found this out when he searched my cell phone while I was sleeping. He found some old text messages and a picture of someone I used to talk to. Instead of asking me about it, he made his own assumptions.

Since this happened I have not felt the same about him. I don't feel like I can trust him anymore. The other problem I have with him is that whenever we don't talk everyday like we normally do, he thinks I'm not happy with him and suggests that we call it quits. This has happened twice. The last time he said it, I agreed. We have both been sad since then. I still love him and always will, but I just don't feel comfortable with the relationship anymore.

Pastor, please, help me.

A.G., Florida, USA.

Dear A.G.,

If you don't feel comfortable in the relationship, move on. He was wrong to search your phone. But on the other hand, you were not very wise in having anything in your phone that would give him the impression that you were playing around with another man. Don't get me wrong, the former relationship was finished with, but he found it difficult to believe you. He is immature.

You gave this relationship your best shot. Perhaps you did too much and the young man felt that he could take liberty with you. You did not know enough about him. an overly jealous man can do crazy things, so don't even try to mend this relationship.

Pastor