Dear Pastor,
I'm a 26-year-old woman living abroad. I am faced with a lot of confusion and am hoping you can help. I am living with my fiancé now for four months and it's hard for me to adjust.
However, that's not the problem. We have been together for three years. He is 36 and has two kids with two different women. The youngest child is three years old. Whenever he is talking to this child's mother, he tends to do it when I am not around. In a sense he would hide and talk to her. When they were together he gave her a phone so he could communicate with the child and she gave him back the phone for some reason.
Text messages
One night he was sleeping and I went through the phone she gave back to him. To my surprise there were some text messages that they had sent to each other saying how they missed each other. When I confronted him about it he said that he did it because he wanted to see his child. He tends to lie a lot and each time he lies I know and I always forgive him because I love him. Another thing is when he wants to go see his child he has to tell her nice things that she wants to hear.
Pastor, do you think that's how he should go about it? What do you think I should do about my situation?
S., USA
Dear S.,
Evidently this man still likes his child's mother. He is living with you, but you can't be sure that he will marry you. He doesn't want you to hear what he is saying when he is talking to his child's mother. I can understand why that bothers you because you are not sure what is going on between them.
Pastor
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