Dear Pastor,

I am a 23-year-old woman living with my husband of almost three years. I love him dearly, but my problem is, he has stopped supporting me financially and he is always accusing me of having someone else. I communicate with a male friend who has a girlfriend. This friend never gets personal or shows me that he wants a piece of me. He says that he is proud of me and is inspired with all that I am doing. I go to school, work two jobs and am a wife. He says it motivates him to strive for a better life because half of what I do, he could not see himself doing at the same time. So as a role model, I advised him that he can. He says that I am the only one who believes in him; not even his own family believes in him. I also advised him that God believes in him.

I really think that my husband should be more concerned about what makes me happy and not just protecting my body from other men. It's like he is protecting a property. I have not yet cheated and I have no plan to cheat.

Pastor, please, help me with my husband because I am too busy to be involved with another man. I hardly even have time to go see a movie. Sometimes I wish to be by myself with no man because, yes, I look good and am educated, but I also need a strong man. I need someone who is a family man and who puts God and his family first. I need someone who has the passion to give praise and thanks to God with his family because we all know, a family that prays together stays together. I even have an ex-boyfriend in Jamaica who I want to tell face to face that I am not his future wife, I am taken and don't wish to commit adultery. But it worries me that he might hurt me because he has not seen me for eight years. I told my husband about him and his fantasy and that my feelings for him died years ago, but this man will not let go.

Pastor, please pray for us. I am going to see family and friends soon in Jamaica, so please pray for my safety.

S.C., Delaware, USA

Dear S.C.,

I suggest that you tell your husband that you have become unhappy because he has stopped supporting you and he is accusing you of having an affair. Tell him that you would like both of you to go and see a counsellor.

You should encourage your husband to take you out sometimes. Some men need to be pushed a little. It is romantic when a woman dates her man. Try it.

Don't give up on your marriage.

Pastor