I am a young man living on my own and paying my own bills. I have a huge problem. I am involved with two women who work at the same place. The first one really loves me and she does anything I ask. She comes over regularly. We were okay until she went abroad and I met woman number two.

The second one was used by a man and I was comforting her and she fell for me. I really like her also and she was willing to do anything for me. Each of them think they are the only one. I don't know what to do because they both trust me and I don't want to seem like 'other men'. It's killing me and they will find out soon. Let me tell you that both of them are suitable to be my wife. I know I should have told the second one that I was taken but I didn't, so now I don't know what to do.

J. J., Hanover, Jamaica

Dear J. J.,

You are a deceiver. You are blaming the second woman for falling in love with you. You said she fell for you. You are so innocent. You did not fall for her. You are no better than her former boyfriend who used her. You are doing the same thing. Yes, man, you are a user too. You are going to cause this young lady to believe that all men are wicked and untrustworthy. I am putting it to you that you are just like 'other men'.

I have a feeling that you have written to big up yourself and to let the world know that you have two women in your life. So, you are a big man. May I ask you to kindly back off. Tell the young woman that you have a girlfriend, and do so today. Men who do not speak the truth about their status often live to regret what they have done because women, contrary to what men believe, have a way of hitting back at men and, when they do, big men cry.

Pastor