DO YOU HAVE A PROBLEM? IS SOMETHING BOTHERING YOU? WRITE TO: TELL ME PASTOR, DR AARON DUMAS, P.O. BOX 188, KING STREET, KINGSTON.

TELEPHONE: 929-1667/8. EMAIL: PASTOR@JAMAICASTAR.COM.

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Dear Pastor,

I have a problem and I don't know what to do. I have been married for 20 years. The problem is my husband stopped doing his marital duties nine years ago. He said I nag too much.

We have five children together. I had another child two years ago, but my husband is not the father. He was deported back to Jamaica and I had a friend who showed me some attention and I got pregnant. Remember we were still married but we were not living together. He showed me no love, no affection, no anything. I was very lonely. He said that there was nobody else, but I don't know if that is true.

Sleep in different rooms

Well, he came back to the United States and I had this other child, but he loves her like his own. but, he still has no love for me. We still live together, but we sleep in different rooms. I love him, but I don't think he feels the same. I have nowhere to go so I have to stay around and we still have small children. I can't figure out what God wants me to do.

Pastor, please advise me. I feel like I am going crazy. Please help me. Thank you.

N. S., Georgia, USA

Dear N. S.,

You are fortunate that your husband loves your last child although he is not the biological father. I am assuming that he has forgiven you for your infidelity. I wonder if something has gone wrong with your husband and he has not told you. What I am trying to say is, I wonder if he is suffering from erectile dysfunction and he is afraid to let you know that he cannot have an erection.

The question is, why have you suffered in silence for such a long time? It is time for you to confront your husband and to tell him that you are yearning to have him in your arms again, so whatever might be the problem, it should be dealt with so that you will not be tempted to find comfort in the arms of another man. If your husband is really having a problem there are many things that he can do to satisfy you. It is time for both of you to talk.

Pastor.