Dear Pastor,

I live in the States but I have Jamaican roots. My parents are from Jamaica but I was born in America. I date single men but I prefer to date married men. I have dated single men from Jamaica but they were very mean, aggressive and controlling.

I love to date married men because they are caring, loving and helpful. I get thrills by going with married men because I know they are married, have to protect their marriage and the relationship between us will not last. Lots of my friends go with married men who are 50 years and older. Many of them are businessmen and they love to have young women go with them when they go out of State for conferences and on business trips.

The man I am now going with is wealthy. I am not in need of anything. Married men have experience and more money than single men. Single men in there 20s and 30s are searching for a place in society. They are too controlling. Married men seek out girls like me who are attractive, especially when their wives are pregnant.

My man pays all my bills and I am able to drive a nice car. Pastor, I am asking you not to condemn women who go with married men. These men seek us out and we seek them out too. They have their needs and we have our needs.

My boyfriend does not sleep at my house. He goes home every night to his wife. I am 28 and not interested in getting married. I just want to live my life the way I am living. I don't want to be a slave to any young man.

T.R., U.S.A

Dear T.R.,

Please understand that although you are young and beautiful, you will not remain that way all the days of your life. Beauty will fail you. You are behaving almost like a high-class prostitute, moving from one married man to the other. Whether you want to admit it you are selling your stuff. The day may come when you are going to look back and regret the life you have lived.

You have a right to remain single if that's your choice, but what you are doing by condemning all single men is a form of excuse for what you are doing. Not all single men are arrogant and controlling. Some are, but not all. Many married men are very controlling, jealous and abusive. They may have more money than single men but they are not always very liberal in giving unless women are willing to do what they want them to do.

I am not here to condemn you but I would suggest you have a long look at yourself and ask how long are you going to continue your lifestyle. Whether you know it or not, your problem is greed. You want much more than you need and you want everything now. As a result, men are going to use you and you are going to use them.

It is too bad you do not yet understand there are better ways for you to earn money.

Pastor