Dear Pastor,

As it regards the letter published in your column in the Star dated May 04, my heart goes out for that woman and I can understand how she felt. I read your response and, as a man, I believe your response was heartless and inconsiderate. This woman is broken. She has been going through a period of depression as a result of her husband's attitude towards her and she turned to you for help.

You said in your response that you do not doubt that her husband has not been treating her well, but you have shown no form of compassion to the 'Broken Soul'.

That is not what the Bible instructs you to do and that is not what Jesus would say to a woman in such a state. You condemn the woman as being 'perfect' judging by the tone of her letter. You are blinded because you probably would have treated your wife the same way or worse.

You told the lady that she should have been ashamed to write to you telling you that she messed up the sheets as a result of her husband not providing for her. The woman was trying to make you understand how bad her situation was. Have you read the letter properly?

ill-treatment

She said she has poured so much into her husband's life for the five years they have been married, and what does she get in return; ill-treatment. No man should treat a woman like that. She is his wife and he should have been the one to provide for her, assure her if he sensed there is mistrust. But rather than offering words of comforts, prayers, and pleading to the husband publicly, you judged the woman, and called her names, "intemperate, miserable etc."

You elaborated on what the husband was already doing. You don't realise that this woman needs help. There was nowhere in the letter that said she was "Blaming everybody for her problems," but that's all you could see.

Where is the compassion in your response, pastor? This woman turned to you for help and you judged her, condemned her, called her names and told her to check herself. What kind of pastor are you? You didn't even mention anything about the pastor who tried to take advantage of the woman.

Pastor, you will give an account for turning that woman away in her time of need. And if you deny anything that I said in this letter, you have confirmed to the public that you are a black sheep who has been leading God's saints astray. God said He came to save the lost souls, and that lost soul came to you and you condemned her. May God show you mercy.

M.W.

Dear M.W.,

I hope you feel very happy that I have taken the time to read your letter and to respond. At no time did I condemn this woman. I spoke the truth. I do not accept that a decent woman who is expecting her period would not prepare for it by purchasing sanitary napkins or use other methods that women use when they are not financially able to buy sanitary pads. This woman said that, because her husband did not give her money to buy pads she allowed her period to mess up her bed linens. She purposely did so and blamed her husband for not giving her money.

I can say to you that, regardless of how you have described me, I consider what she has done as wrong. Clean women wouldn't allow that to happen, unless of course their period came down on them suddenly on the road.

You are free to describe me in any way you feel. You say that I judged the woman and condemned her, but your very letter is condemning me. Have fun. I am glad you are not God and that I do not have to give an account of my stewardship to you.

A good Christian would pray for me even if he/she doesn't agree with the position I have taken.

Pastor