Home - The Star
November 26, 2012
Star Tell Me Pastor


Wicked family
Dear Pastor,

I am 18 and I am going through some stuff with my family that I can't seem to understand. They have constantly abused me, but after I left high school and tried to make something of myself, it got even worse. It was as if my ambition angered them or a seed of grudge, envy and jealousy had been planted in their hearts, because their actions were like stems that grew leaves only to cast a shadow over my life.

I used to live with my sisters and I genuinely thought that they wanted the best for me, but they didn't. Before I sat my CXC examinations, my sister who didn't like me destroyed my thumb drive with my SBA's for nothing at all, and then boasted about it, all because she knew that my mother favours her and nothing would be derived from the issue. I got my subjects anyway.

I have been going through hell, even with my mom, because she favours one child more than the other. I met a young man in my last year of high school, and to be honest, it was God that had sent him. Before I knew him my younger sister did and she liked him but she wasn't in his league. She is wild. He and I got in a relationship, which had brought great support, motivation and positivity to my life. He was the one who had pushed me to apply for a job. I love and respect my mom but it was the other way around for her. She treats me badly, and also disrespects the guy I am with. Because my boyfriend is intelligent, my mom says that he chats too much. She also embarrasses me in public and threatens to tell things to the public that would scar my reputation. She is overseas now.

refuse to let me in

I am at home for weeks and my older sister would cook and doesn't leave any for me and I haven't started working as yet. They would malice me for nothing. When I go out, they refuse to let me in. When it was my birthday, it was pure malice with my younger sister.

Recently, my younger sister and I had a conflict that brought grave truth and discomfort from them, including my stepfather who threatened to chop my head off. There were strangers in the yard at the time of the dispute and one of my sisters started telling me they don't like me and that was why they didn't give me anything to eat or let me into the house when I go out at nights. She even said they spit in the food they give to me and her father is going to chop me up if I don't leave the house. She said I must leave and die, or go and live with my boyfriend.

To be honest, because I feared for my life and what they might do, my boyfriend's family accepted me in and they are like what I always wished for. I am trying to uphold a Christian faith and I need to know if you think I have done the right thing by leaving.

Should I live my life and forget them?

I am awaiting your response.


Dear K.K.,

You did the right thing by leaving the home. Of course, the threats that were made on your life should be reported to the police. I hope that the people who have taken you in will continue to treat you well.


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