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January 24, 2013
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Con gyal drama

Bless up all Tambareen Fambily linky-linky an mi propa-propa Mix-Up massive. An nuff respek to all listeners pon Tambareen Radio ova Mix-Up Yaad (mixupyaad.com). Outa Orda! crew big up unu self.

On to di mix-up:

Con Gyal drama

Raga, I read your column regularly for the laughs. I am a Jamaican and I live abroad, and your column is a must read to get that real Jamaican flavour in entertainment, and to know what's going on at home.

But I notice that you are not only about laughs and this is why I want to ask your opinion on a matter. I live in New York and my wife lives in Jamaica. Since we have been together I have been visiting her in Jamaica and after we got married, I immediately filed for her. Everything went ok and she is now cleared to move here and live with me in the United States.

But Raga, she keeps coming up with a lot of excuses that prevent her from coming up. Now I'm not sure what to think. I don't believe that she would go so far and marry me if she didn't really want to be with me here. So I'm thinking that she is just having a hard time leaving all her family and friends and relocating to somewhere far away. But I'm still worried because she has a set time in which she must come up to the States, and we are now very near to the deadline.

Raga, the other thing is that she lives with her mother, but I have never met her mother. She explained that her mother is very traditional and was all set on her marrying her ex-fiancÚ, and does not want to see her with any other man. I met her brothers and her friends, but I have never met her mother.

no excitement

She doesn't even bring up conversations about coming to the States with me. She never shows any excitement about the thought of moving in and living with me. I am a little unsure about what's going on now. What do you think?

Massa, dat gyal a con yuh. I don't think it's a situation where she's just straight up disrespecting you and using you like a fool. But it sounds like you are simply a convenience for the time being; or perhaps you are a backup to someone else that she has. Or it could just be greed, where she is already in a relationship but is just making sure she gets whatever she can from you in addition to what she's already getting with whomever else she is also with now.

I say all this because it is very weird for a woman who is CLOSE to her mother to NOT tell her mother of 1. a man that she is with for so long, 2. a man to whom she was engaged and is now married - which also means you both got married without her mother knowing (even though you did not state this), and 3. that she plans to leave her mother and Jamaica to permanently live with her husband in another country.

No woman weh close to har mother an a program all dem tings deh nuh mek har mumma know wa a gwaan. Supm eena supm! Aneda man coulda eena di supm! Some ginalship a gwaan.

Mi woulda undastan if she neva live wid har mada an dem neva get along. But being that she's so close to her mother her story just doesn't make any sense.

Mi strongly suspect say she live wid a man. Probably di same fiancÚ weh shi did a link wid fram long time. Or probably she have a nex man a farin weh couldn't married to har 'an she jus a use you fi bring har up to him. Mi nuh sure what's di story, but mi sure yuh DOAN have di whole story.

It look like yuh a goh haffi man up inna di ting ya now. Yuh fi tell har say afta doing all weh yuh do fi bring har up a 'Merica, an fi see har a hitch now wid a bag a excuses, dat a lone divorce yuh a pree now, an dat yuh a goh cancel di filing. Do dat an wateva move she mek wi mek di ting cleara. But yuh haffi serious wen yuh a dweet, an doan mek she feel like yuh jus a run off yuh mout cause yuh weak to har.

Hear mi man, yuh coulda haffi jus fling dat a bush an find a betta woman who can truly appreciate the good man dat yuh are. Backside!!, yuh know how much good woman deh a Jamaica right now who woulda do well wid a good man who a goh love dem, marry dem, an file fi dem goh di United States? She mus know why she a hitch wid di ting. But wateva di case yuh cyaan jus de deh a wait-wait like yuh eediat. Afta yuh a nuh waita! KMT! Yuh already do everyting weh yuh coulda do fi demonstrate say yuh committed to har an a she yuh want spen yuh life wid. A fi har time now fi show yuh say she really want di marriage an she really waan fi be wid yuh. An if she still naa step up, den yuh fi jus leggo dat a gully. She wrenk eeh??!!

Today's column is a repeat of a previous Mix-up and Blenda from Ragashanti. We apologise for any inconvenience caused.

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