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March 7, 2013
Star Tell Me Pastor


Sexually abused by my cousins

Dear Pastor,

I am a 17-year-old girl. I always read your column and I am so glad that God brought a person like you to this world to help the needy. From the age of seven (that is when I became aware of myself and can remember certain things) I came to realise that all my cousins wanted to have sex with me. I was afraid to tell my mother because she might have gone crazy.

Sometimes when they held me at the point where I had to give into them, I made fake romantic noises to fool them. Sometimes I even told them that it hurts to let them think that they were penetrating me. They have even given me money for having sex with them. I don't want to put the blame on only them, but myself for giving in.


Dear K.,

You should have reported your cousins to your mother. They started to sexually abuse you from a tender age and although there were times when you tried to resist them, there were other times when you gave in. And because you kept silent, the abuse continued.

They treated you as a little prostitute. They bought not only sex from you but also your silence. I am really sorry to hear what has happened to you, but I will not condemn you because you were young, uninformed and na´ve. All your cousins who took advantage of you should have been arrested, tried and put in prison.

I hope that this sexual abuse has come to an end. And I suggest that you make an appointment with a family counsellor for professional help. I also hope that you are in school and pursuing a career. All the best and may God bless you.


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