I have had many men in my life

May 04, 2021

Dear Pastor,

I am having a problem. I am living with my boyfriend and I am not interested in marrying him, but I don't want to be living without a man. In this pandemic, I feel that I should have a man around.

I have a good job and my salary is not bad. Before I had this man in my life, I used to have lots of boyfriends. Any man who showed interest in me, I used to challenge them. If they were good, I used to give them a second chance, but some of them only had mouth - a lot of chat but nothing more; but this man and I have fun together.

We have been together since last January. He does not ask me for loans, as other men have done. Sometimes when the bills come, he takes them and clear them without my asking. He likes to cook, so I am enjoying his cooking. He does not wash or clean. He wants me to meet his side of the family, but I told him I am not ready for that, and neither am I ready for a family.

I am 26 years old. I can't see myself getting married now. Pastor, I have had many men in my life and if I should tell him the number, he wouldn't want to marry me -- that's how I feel. My mother wants to see grandchildren from me and this man would really make a good husband, but I don't want to get married now.

Do you think something is wrong with me?


Dear S.K.,

According to your letter, you are very promiscuous and it is still within you to run around. You have not been doing so now, but you believe in your heart that you might start again. You are not sure of yourself.

You are not willing to take the chance to get married, so you should remain as you are until you are very sure that you will be faithful to this man with whom you are living. I hope that you will treat this man well, because he is a good man and he is not with you for your money. Try to behave and be a good spouse to him. I wish you well.


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