My husband is a workaholic

Dear Pastor,

I wrote to you before and you gave me good advice. I got married to another man and now our relationship is not doing well. I have two little boys with this man.

He told me that he will never give up on me, but I am fed up with him. He does not have time for me. He is too busy selling insurance. He does not have time for the boys. I come home early from work so that our helper can go home and be with her family.

My husband never comes home early and whenever I talk to him, he makes a big fuss. Sometimes I wonder whether he has another woman. How can a man be so busy so that he neglects his wife and children? He says I should not just think about the present, I should think about the future, and that is what he is working on, our future, which means buying a house and having investments.

My children love their father. If I say anything about him that they do not like, they tell me not to say those things about their father. I begged his mother to appeal to him, especially on a weekend to stay with the children. If I fuss too much, he tells me to get the boys dressed and he will take them to their grandmother. That is not what I want; I want him to spend time with them as a father.

When my husband is not out selling insurance, he is studying, or on the telephone talking to clients. His clients are more important than his family, it seems. I could have gone back to university to do my master's degree, but I chose not to so that I can be with my children. Am I too hard on my husband? I would rather have him around than out making more money by working hard. People see us and feel that we are doing well as husband and wife, but we could do much better if my husband would spend more time with his boys and I. What are your suggestions?

Y.T.