Husband’s babymothers are too greedy

Dear Pastor,

I am a regular reader of your column. It is very educational and entertaining.

My husband says that sometimes you are too blunt. He has three children with three different women. Since I met him, he told me that he has changed. People in this community have said the same about him. I have met his three babymothers. When I told them that I am from America, they asked me for stuff, not only for the children, but also for themselves. I am tired of it now. Two of the children's mothers are not employed and they have other children. The oldest child is 11 years old. The mother is asking us to take him to America.

We have two children of our own. We do not want any more. I refuse to be burdened down with a woman's child, while the mother is free to run around and sell her body for a few Jamaican dollars, and then tell us what the child needs. Sometimes when these women call, my husband does not want to take the phone, but I have told him that he should always talk to them, and talk to the children. We are packing a barrel and we are putting everything necessary in this barrel to send to Jamaica ahead of our visit, which will be in December.

My husband's parents are alive, so we are planning to stay with them for at least a week or two. They are wonderful people. They don't ask us for anything. My husband's father is an elder in his church. He is a gentleman. My husband's mother told me that she used to warn her son not to spread his wild oats on women, but he never listened to her. He is trying his best, Pastor, but if he follow these women he will be a pauper.

Please, give us your advice.

S.M.

Dear S.M.,

The mothers of these children are behaving as if your husband is wealthy, and that he is picking up money on the street.

Your husband has been trying to support his children the best way he can. The mothers of these children are asking for too much. He should have a set amount to send to these children, and he should allow you, his wife, to determine when he will send the money.

Of course, it is likely that they are going to curse you and say that you are controlling your husband. But please, do not allow what they say to bother you. He is your husband and you have a right to watch how he spends his money.

These women in Jamaica should try to seek employment. I am glad that you are coming to Jamaica for Christmas. Your children need to know their siblings. Take care of yourself until I hear from you again.

Pastor