Society needs love

February 07, 2017

What is love? This is a question that has stumped many intellectual minds, from Greek philosophers to modern day scholars. The Merriam-Webster Dictionary defines love in several ways — a feeling of strong or constant affection for a person; attraction that includes sexual desire; the strong affection felt by people who have a romantic relationship;  and a person you love in a romantic way. 

My Christian colleagues will be familiar with one of the most popular Bible verses that speaks about love: 1 Corinthians 13:4-5. It says, “Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonour others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.”

At the end of the day, most of us a have a basic understanding of love and what role it plays in our lives. The Greek have four different words for love — agápe, éros, philía, and storge. For the purpose of this article I want to focus on eros or romantic love — the love we experience in our intimate relationships.

When two individuals choose each other and make the decision to commit, most of the times this decision is motivated by love.  However, the rate at which relationships are ending paints a different picture. Even worse, the repeated news of consistent abuse and women losing their lives in relationships makes it hard for some persons to believe that love exists — or even if it does, that it’s blind. 

So what does it mean to be in love with someone?

According to movies, music and even religious books, love is supposed to feel good. It’s what you are encouraged to build relationships on. It’s the reason why many people make incredible sacrifices — because of love. 

Can you love someone and hurt them? 

Many of us believe that love is not supposed to hurt at all, but all evidence points to the contrary.  Loving someone gives them access and they see you at vulnerable moments, so getting hurt is a definite possibility. Even victims in abusive relationships come to see their abuse as an expression of love from their abuser. 

How important is love to our happiness?

As social creatures, human beings naturally yearn to be connected to each other. So love is important to our existence as a species.  Beyond that, life is better, healthier and happy with love in it. 

We have much hurt and hardships in our society that makes us very cynical and getting hurt multiple times has caused some persons to give up on love all together. However, the eternal optimist in me wants to believe that love is that sparkle that makes life just a little happier.  So, I love and being in love, and I encourage everyone to tell the people in your life how much you love them when you can while they are still alive and are able to appreciate it. Don’t wait until they are dead to write it in their eulogy.  Celebrate love today. 

Have fun and stay sexy. 

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