Questions to ask before sex with a new partner

April 11, 2017
Did you also know that maintaining a healthy sex life is also good for your skin and hair, keeping both youthful, glowing and quite healthy?

When it comes to dating, there are many new experiences as a couple gets to know each other.

From the first phone call to the first kiss, all efforts are focused on finding out as much about each other as possible so that they can decide if and how long they continue to share time and space.

During this period of discovery, as a couple embarks on the tedious task of starting a new relationship, there are several important conversations they must have.

Specifically, before a couple decides to share physical intimacy, there are certain questions that must be asked.


What's your sexuality?


This is a question that some persons find offensive but is necessary because the answer will make it clear where you stand as a couple.

Also, people typically assume that everyone is heterosexual instead of talking about it. Sexuality is complex. It includes more than what is considered 'acceptable' by society's standards, and many people do not identify as heterosexual even though they are in heterosexual relationships.

Furthermore, asking a prospective partner what his/her sexuality is, helps to indicate if you're compatible as a couple.


What's your STD/HIV Status?


Many new couples take it for granted that they can use condoms so it's as if knowing their partner's status is not an issue. Actually, it is.

The condom only protects the penis during sexual intercourse; oral sex and other sexual contact can spread disease. Also, remember that condoms are not 100 per cent effective, so knowing each other's STD/HIV status is just practical.


What are you into?


So many couples don't take the time to talk to each other about their sexual needs and preferences. With unlimited access to pornography on the Internet and an infinite supply of erotic movies and novels, a person can get some very clear ideas about things they might be into.

This is usually the part of the relationship where many assumptions are made. This approach is very impractical since it's so much easier to just ask. This can also be a fun conversation because you may discover that as a couple, you have much in common sexually that you can explore together.


What are your expectations?


Sex means different things to different people.

For some, it's a physical expression of their feelings, while for others, it's just a way to 'get their rocks off'. So it's important that all parties be on the same page.

Take the time to state how you feel, and ask your prospective partner about his/her plans, if any, after sex is over. Is it a one-time thing, or is it the beginning of something more permanent? Too many couples get off to a confusing start because both parties have different expectations.


Are you having a sexual relationship with anyone else?


It is naÔve to assume that just because someone is single and is now showing an interest in you that they are not having sex with anyone else.

Having multiple sexual partners also increases the chance of contracting an STD. Knowing how many other sexual partners there are is vital because it will affect how you decide to move forward as a couple, and it can also be a deal breaker for some persons.

The only way to really know how your prospective partner feels is to ask and be clear with your questions.

Be honest with your feelings, and ask for what you want. That's the only way to ensure that your needs are met.

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