He lied about an accident to cheat

October 13, 2016

Dear Pastor

I am writing to you in tears. I really need your advice. I have been with my son's father for six years now. We are both in our early 20s. We have had our fair share of problems, but we always worked them out. I would say we had a happy relationship. Well, at least that was what I believed.

I am very close to one of his cousins. I would say she is my best friend. I always go by his house to stay for a week, sometimes more or less. He lives with his parents. His parents and I get along well, especially his mother.

Now, Pastor, he rides a motorcycle and one day, I didn't hear from him all day, so I said I would call him in the night because it's not like him to not call me all day. At about 6 o'clock that afternoon he texted me saying he had an accident, but it wasn't a bad one. He said he was OK and that he just got some bruises.

His cousin and I texted each other everyday. She was at the hairdresser that day, but on her way home, she stopped at his house. They are neighbours, Pastor. She said she overheard his sister telling their mother that he has a girl over there, so I asked him. He said anyone who said that is lying because he slept all day. I heard at least six different stories, so I just let it go. I now realise that was the mistake I made.

About two months, later his cousin called me telling me not to say anything to him, but she saw him and a girl on his bike. She said they seemed to spend the night together because they were coming from a house his brother rented and that it was very early in the morning, pastor. I was at work and I was so shocked. He and I just had sex two days before that, and up to the night before she saw them, we were chatting and everything was good. I got mad because he texted me like nothing happened, so I told him that I have eyes and ears everywhere and I know everything.




This guy started disrespecting me and asking me if I believe we would be together forever. So I told him to go his way and I'll go mine, just make sure he supports the baby. He is still with the girl, I am sure of that. He brought money for the baby and was trying to get me to go to bed with him, but I did not allow that. When we were together he would bring the money early. Now he takes a week before he comes. I am fed up of his behaviour. Sometimes, I really need the money urgently and it makes no sense that I say anything because he does nothing. It's like he does not care for the baby because we have broken up.


Dear S.L.

You know this man is having a relationship with another girl and he only considers you to be his babymother. He would have sex with you from time to time with your consent. He made it clear that the relationship with him was not permanent. That is why he asked you if you believed that the relationship that you are having with him is forever. He does not see it as permanent. So now that you know how he feels, don't make yourself a fool.

See that he support his child. Encourage him to bring the money on time. If you don't want to be used, don't go to bed with him. I hope that the time will not come that you will have to take this man to court for child support.


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