Not prepared for a baby


January 06, 2017

Dear Pastor,

I am 18 years old and my boyfriend is 21. We met on Facebook when we were in high school, but I wasn't interested in him because he was always getting involved in other people's problems. He is still doing it and I don't like it.

We got engaged on February 23 last year on my birthday. Our families get along well and understand each other fully. We don't argue, quarrel, etc, although I am a very miserable person at times. He's very hard-working, caring, honest and trustworthy. He is a good man.

I'm now pregnant with his child. We didn't expect it, but we have to cope with the situation. He is insisting that I am going to have twin because he is a twin also. He's a chef, and I'm training to be a front office agent at the HEART Academy.

Pastor, give us some advice on how to keep our relationship still flowing and to get even better.


Dear S.S.,

You speak as if you have a perfect man and that his only fault is that he meddles in other people's affairs. It is nice to know that the people on your side of the family have accepted him, and on his side, they have accepted you.

You and this young man made a mistake by having unprotected sex, and now you are expecting a child. This child is going to be an awesome responsibility for both of you, and you have said that you were not prepared for a child. You should have known that by having unprotected sex, anything could happen. So, now that you are pregnant, both of you would have to plan to have a home where the child can be raised in a proper and safe environment. You will need lots of help from your relatives and trusted friends. And this man might have to get a better job to support his family.

Perhaps you might have to delay attending HEART until you have given birth. This is something you should discuss with your man and the people at HEART. Remember, life will not be the same now that you are pregnant. And you will really see the true mettle of your boyfriend now that you are pregnant, and especially after the baby is born.

I know that you are young and you will make mistakes, but please do not bring any unnecessary pressure on this young man. If you do, he will become depressed and frustrated.

I wish both of you well. Take time to read your Bible, pray and go to church.


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