A man paid me for sex and my boyfriend found out


December 22, 2016

Dear Pastor,

I was having a good relationship with a man, but my mother didn't like him.

In January of this year, he saw me with a man and he asked me who this man was. I told him a lie, and that was the mistake I made. He did not say anything.

One day this man and I met again at the same place, but I did not know that my boyfriend was watching me. I went away with the guy in a car and my boyfriend saw us.

He went to my house and waited on me. I did not get home until 10 p.m. I was shocked to see him sitting on some blocks outside waiting on me.

When I came in the yard, he asked where I was coming from and I told him I had to do overtime. I went in, and the first thing he did was to smell my hands and push his hand underneath me. He told me that I had sex. I could not deny that I had sex although I told him that I didn't. He raised his hand to hit me, so I told him the truth. He cursed me and told me that he will not come back to see me.

I don't know what got into me because I love my boyfriend more than the other guy. Every time the other guy has sex with me, he gives me $3,000.

My boyfriend doesn't pay me for sex. He gives me money too, but not as much. My boyfriend asked me how many times I have gone out to have sex with the guy and I told him two times. But it is more than that. I have stopped doing that now, but my boyfriend does not believe me. He does not trust me anymore, and I want him to trust me.


Dear F.K.

You lied to your boyfriend, but he did not have to humiliate you by searching you. Although you were lovers, you were selling sex. It will be difficult for him to trust you again.

I suggest that you learn to come clean, but it is never advisable to tell a man everything you have done. He may use that against you when you have a disagreement.

You mentioned the number of times you have had sex with this man, but I have deleted it. From what you said, you were taking home "a bag of money" each week.

Don't tell him how much you were paid. If you do, he will want to know what you did with the money.

Perhaps both of you should go to see a family counsellor if you believe there is a future in this relationship.


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