Husband and my friend had sex beside me


October 31, 2018

Dear Pastor,

I am 25 years old and I am worried about my situation. I am married to a 30-year-old man. I have a good friend.

She is living with her boyfriend, but these days they are not getting along very well. So, she stays with us sometimes.

She sleeps on the couch most nights because we only have one room and one bed.

One night my husband went to sleep early. She and I were watching television. Our television is in the bedroom. I told her that she could just come up on the bed with us.

I fell asleep, and while I was sleeping, I felt the bed shaking. I woke up to see my husband on her. I got so mad, I started to punch him, and he said that it was a mistake and that he took her for me.

I asked my girlfriend if she did not know what she was doing and she said yes, but she was taking a chance and she didn't know I would wake up.

This man and I have been going from school days. He couldn't mistake her for me because I am slim and she is fat. I was in the middle of both of them.

When I raised my voice, my husband tried to put his dirty hand over my mouth. It was about 3:30 in the morning. I told her to go home, but she couldn't go because it was late.

When it was daylight and my husband left for work, I asked her to tell me the truth, and she said my husband came over to her side of the bed and started to kiss her and play with her vagina, and climbed on her and she didn't know what to do, so she allowed him to have sex with her.

She asked me for forgiveness. This woman is 41 years old.

Pastor, I don't know what to do. It has been six months now since I caught them having sex. I have hardly had sex with my husband since that time.

Now he is accusing me of having another man because I am not having sex with him. Please, give me your advice.


Dear P.E.,

I am very sorry to know that your husband disrespected you right under your nose, on your matrimonial bed, so to speak. Your so-called friend was very much up to what your husband did.

She could have resisted your husband. While you were asleep he went over to your friend's side of the bed and started to play around.

She could have said no if she didn't agree to what he was doing. She could have woken you up.

You said that the reason she kept quiet is because she didn't know what to do. That is foolishness. She probably admired him and loved him long ago.

Your husband has no respect for you at all. On the other hand, some people may blame you by saying you 'putting butter in puss mouth'.

You shouldn't have invited her to sleep on the bed, but I am sure you meant no harm. Don't allow that woman to sleep on your bed again. She has asked you for forgiveness.

You may forgive her, but don't trust her with your husband anymore.

Concerning your husband and yourself, both of you should make an appointment to see a family counsellor.


Other Tell Me Pastor Stories