My brother treats our home like a sex shop


January 11, 2019

Dear Pastor,

I am 19 years old and I am having a problem with one of my brothers who is 23. My father has five children, four with my mother and one outside. My father and mother are living in Florida. I live at the family home with one of my brothers. He has lots of girlfriends, and he brings them to the house one by one. I complained to my parents, and they told him not to bring anymore women to the house. He has not stopped.

Recently, he brought one of his girlfriends. She didn't look older than 16. When I told him the girl should not sleep with him at the house, he told me that he can do whatever he wants. I told the girl that she should leave, and my brother wanted to fight me because I told her to leave. I called my parents, and they spoke to him and told him that he shouldn't allow the girl to stay here.

On January 3, 2019, he brought in another girl late in the night. I was not sleeping, but I was in bed. I could hear him having sex with the girl. I had to put a pillow over my head because they were making so much noise. I did not see her because he took her away early in the morning.

The reason why I am writing you at this time is because a woman came here to look for my parents. She said she is five months pregnant for my brother. She said that she has not seen him since she told him that she is pregnant, so she came to my parents to complain about him. I had to lie and tell her that he does not live at this house anymore. She is not working, and she needs help to purchase things for the baby.


I have a boyfriend, but I do not let him come here and sleep with me. I am not a saint, pastor, but I have respect for my brothers, although they don't have any respect for me. If my brother had one girlfriend, I could deal with that. But he has so many of them, and now he is hiding from one who is pregnant. He said the child is not his. He did not want me to tell my parents, but I have already told them, and it is causing big problems between us.


Dear M.J.,

If your brother does not believe that he is responsible for getting this woman pregnant, that will not be difficult to prove. This woman should be encouraged to take him to court, and a DNA test will prove whether or not he is the biological father. In some homes, siblings don't have respect for each other. Some sisters sleep with their men in the house while their parents are there, and some men sleep with their women while their parents are there, also. Some brothers and sisters share the same room with their lovers.

Evidently, your brother feels that nothing is wrong in taking his women into your parents' home. He expects you to be quiet about it. And, if you were allowing your man to sleep with you, he probably would have used that against you.

This woman who is pregnant and is trying to find your brother will eventually find him. It would be better for him to face her and deal with the matter. As I said, a DNA test can easily prove that.


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